The following is a proposal to the VSA council:

Killing Us Softly with Your Mom: Towards a More Gender-Sensitive Activism

by Liz Green and Nicole Lauricella-Pack

In this tract, we will pursue the woman question as manifested in the context of undergraduate insurrection. During our extensive field research, the two authors have uncovered several disturbing trends which have bifurcated said community. The root of this schism lies deep in the phantasm that is "your mom".

The inherent hypocrasy as expressed by purportedly humanistic individuals who simultaneously deride the sexual prowess of our mothers must no longer be tolerated. Would said individuals sexualize the proletariat? We think not. Such double standards regarding discursivity perpetuate the patriarchal agenda. Just for an example, let us try saying "your Marx" after a spirited interchange. We will forewarn the Marxists: the following contains potentially offensive material.

Nicole: Hey Liz! That midterm was pretty easy, wasn't it?

Liz: Yeah kinda like your Marx was last night!

Nicole: Oh real deep.

Liz: Your Marx was deeper...

As we said, if you are a true Marxist this would be an offensive dialogue. Well, in the words of Hovance "now you know what it feels like to be a woman, Sparky" [at a seminal meeting of the VSA council in which the all-important executive student body voted on whether it was appropriate to vote on whether or not others could vote on matters concerning the theft of the women's center, Jemma Hovance interrupted this static with these words which shall carry on for years in local feminist and activist circles.]

We therefore find it self-evident that a motion be passed by a commitee to form a commitee that will enforce that 'your mom' jokes shall here by be 'your Marx' jokes until all Sparkies more deeply understand the woman question. It must by now be abundantly clear that this question probes deeply into the entire student activist body. Your Marx likes to be probed deeply. All in favor??? [gratuitous banging on the table]